I’m pretty loud. I could blame it on my Aries rising or the fact that I’m from New Jersey, but the truth is, it’s just who I am. I grew up in a loud home with a loud family who spoke loudly about absolutely everything– and I’m no exception. It’s a trait that I’ve become grateful for, but growing up, it seemed to only mean one thing: I’m annoying. An adjective that feels like a knife to the soul and one that has made me never want to speak again on multiple occasions.
But I’m here to argue that being annoying is not a bad thing. The reality is the people who find you annoying are just not your people. On the other hand, the right people will appreciate you for exactly who you are. Who cares if some random people who don’t get you are annoyed by you? Besides, I don’t think it’s an inherently “bad” trait. I believe there are far worse things you can be than annoying.
What does it even mean to be annoying? In my experience, the word annoying has been sprung on me largely by men who are sick of hearing me talk. Think about it – when is the last time you heard someone call a man annoying? The last time you heard it be told to a woman? It feels like one of those diminishing adjectives reserved for women to belittle them. If the price of male validation is being less vocal, I think I’ll pass- thanks!
I think being annoying means you’re not afraid to speak your mind. In a time when women’s voices are being silenced across the world, I think you should annoy people with your opinions as much as possible. Personally, I would much rather be known as annoying than be known as passive about my feelings. Being annoying takes a lot of passion, and I find passion to be a beautiful trait to possess.
When it comes to friendships, I don’t think I would have made some of my best friends throughout my life if I wasn’t my loud self. Especially having done theater and choir throughout middle and high school, I was surrounded by the loudest people in school- and I loved it! I never felt like I had to tone my personality down at all. Even to this day, I find I connect most with people when I showcase my real, bold self. Then, whenever I feel the need to compress myself, I find I’m effectively shutting others out. No one formed meaningful relationships by pretending to be something they’re not.
In life, there are inevitably going to be people who don’t like you. There will be people who find you too quiet, too annoying, too boring, and too much. Either way, being annoying isn’t a crime at all. And when it comes to being a girl, I feel that people are probably going to find something to dislike about you no matter what. In that case, I think you should be annoying already! If being annoying means being your truest self, I think that may be the best thing you can do.